Category Archives: TV tonight

TV tonight

Braves (39-43) at Cubs (41-39) — 8:05 p.m. ET on WGN

Ryan Dempster gets the start tonight for the Cubs. He is 5-5 on the season with a 4.09 ERA and hasn’t won consecutive starts all season. He is a model of inconsistency. You could say he is such a Cub, Dempster.

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TV tonight

“SportsNation” — 4:00 p.m. on ESPN2

This is a debut of a new interactive show on ESPN2. I may be on this show in the future. But I will not be on today’s debut. So it will definitely not get cancelled after one episode.

TV tonight

Giants (42-34) at Cardinals (41-38) — 8:15 p.m. ET on ESPN

Cardinals 3B Mark DeRosa has gone 0-for-9 since being acquired from the Indians. Then last night he hurt himself swinging. Yes, swinging. I hope that means he pulled a muscle while engaging in relations with a friend’s wife or that’s a pretty embarrassing injury for a baseball player.

TV this afternoon

No. 6 Andy Roddick vs. Lleyton Hewitt (Wimbledon quarterfinals) — ESPN2

This is not Andy Roddick. 

Or Lleyton Hewitt. 

I actually call the one on the left Hooter. And the one on the right Hooter No. 2. (I get flustered and lose my creativity around hot nakedness.)

But I still feel this picture is relevant.

(Okay, if you must know, this is Brooklyn Decker — Andy Roddick’s wife. But now you just went and ruined the fun of it. Jerk.)

TV tonight

There is absolutely nothing on. Really. Go outside or read a book or something.

What’s that? Did somebody say read a book? Why, just look what book is back on the Amazon.com Bestseller List again

bestseller

And this is more than two years after the book came out! Few books in history have that kind of staying power. Yet there I am — No. 34 on the Amazon.com Bestseller List (in the Bargain Books: Humor, Comics & Pop Culture section).

TV tonight

Mets (37-37) at Brewers (40-35) — 7:05 p.m. ET on ESPN

The Mets are coming off of a three-game sweep at the hands of the Yankees. The Brewers have lost five in a row at home. Something has to give. (Most likely it will be Prince Fielder’s belt buckle or a hamstring of one of the Mets regulars.)

TV this afternoon

No. 6 Andy Roddick vs. No. 20 Tomas Berdych (Wimbledon 4th Round) — 1:00 p.m. ET on ESPN2

brooklyndeckerAm I going to watch this? No, probably not.

But Andy Roddick is typically such a failure on the court that he rarely provides any opportunities to run a picture of his wife. So I’m taking that opportunity now.

And if Roddick is somehow out-choked by other players for the rest of the tournament and advances to the Wimbledon finals or even wins the tournament … well, expect the new site design to be a massive picture of Brooklyn Decker with my writing in 0.00008-font inside her navel.