And there was room at the inn

Brett Favre’s family has booked a block of 25-30 rooms at a Green Bay hotel for the weekend of Vikings-Packers.

I did a little research on the hotel to find out what kind of digs America’s First Family stays in when not mowing it up in Hattiesburg or fighting bears with their bare hands or whatever.

Check out the amenities:

BestWesternFavre

> Complimentary Breakfast — Nice. But the Favres only eat meat and potatoes with pinch of salt of the earth.

> Fitness Center — Have to stay in shape for those two-hand touch football games in the grassy field back home. And the gym dress code better allow jeans.

> Airport Shuttle — But does the Green Bay airport have flights direct to Hattiesburg? And can the shuttle be a big farm tractor pulling a wagon full o’ Favres?

> Pets Allowed — Fantastic. There’s room for you to sleep at the foot of the bed, Peter King.

> Pool — This is a regional term. In Hattiesburg they are called “community cleanin’ ponds.”

> Restaurant On-site — Back home, the nearest restaurant is 1,025 miles away. And the Favres have to mow uphill both ways.

> Hot Tub — Oh, yes. Mark Chmura will definitely be there.

> Room Service — Can we get some Oxycontin up here?

> High Speed Internet — Not necessary. The Favres don’t use the Internet. Too new-fangled. They text message the media directly with their propaganda.

All in all, it looks like a pretty fancy place. I mean, a Best Western motor lodge. Whoo-eee. Niiiiiice. So much for your everyman image — eh, Favre? Soon you’re family will be living large in the penthous (second floor) at a Motel 6.

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3 responses to “And there was room at the inn

  1. Hey, c’mon now. Just because pets are allowed, doesn’t mean there’s “room” for Peter King at the foot of the beds. Did it say there beds are XXXL?

  2. I heard this ‘story’ on my local sports radio station and I about drove off the road. Now that we are chronicling Favre family travel plans, it is just time for the NFL Network to start NFL2–The Brett Favre Channel. Only then could I find out the really interesting things about Brett like–his favorite robe material (alpaca), where he plans to send his kids for summer camp (Tom Brady Skillz Camp), and his wife’s favorite sexual position (Brett out of town). It will make my life more complete I am sure.

    You know what? On second thought, f–k Brett Favre.

  3. Three things that should happen to Brett Favre.

    1) Ozzie Guillen crashes a party at his house and overstays his welcome. “What are you going to do f–ktard, call the cops?”

    2) Minnesota spurns his advances and trades for Aaron Rodgers instead.

    3) He is involved in an all too common mowing accident involving a Nerf football and his right arm up to the elbow.

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