101 Baseball Places To See Before You Strike Out by Josh Pahigian
Hmm, a book full of interesting baseball sites to visit. That sounds interesti- … hey, what do you mean before I strike out? Who are you to tell me I’m going to strike out, a-hole? You don’t know anything about me. I’m actually a fairly capable slow-pitch softball player, thank you very much. And to strike out in slow-pitch softball you pretty much have to be athletically disabled.
What’s that? You didn’t mean before I strike out literally? You mean … before I die?!
Oh, yeah … that’s soooo much better.
You know what? Screw you, guy. You sound like a total prick. I definitely do not need to buy a book that’s so flippant about my death.
I’m going to start writing my next book: Josh Pahigian, Author of Baseball Books, Is Going to Die of AIDS of the Eye by DJ Gallo. I trust you’ll enjoy its morbid tone.