Brett Favre, revisited

I have taken my fair share of shots at Brett Favre over the years. You know, for him being an attention whore. And for that whole Brett-Favre-not-being-a-good-quarterback thing. But like all people, Brett Favre is a complex person. He is more than just an a–hole who sucks at his job. Really.

For example, in this week’s issue of The Sporting News, former teammate Mark Chmura says Favre used to demonstrate his arm strength in training camp by throwing the ball deliberately at Chmura’s crotch. 

Chmura saw it as a sort of jock joke. But I think we all can assume that Favre was merely trying to protect young girls from his pedophile tight end.

Well done, Brett Favre. Well done. Perhaps you are a hero.

(Although, in fairness, with your accuracy, you probably missed Chmura’s crotch completely, and instead struck a young girl in the head, leaving her laying unconscious on the ground beside the child predator Chmura. That makes you an accomplice, Brett Favre, you dick.)

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7 responses to “Brett Favre, revisited

  1. Peter Rypterhymen

    Was Chuey in a hot tub at the time of the incident?

  2. Fuck you, DJ, I’d like to see you play quarterback as well as Brett Favre did.

  3. sportspickle

    Whoops. I think you meant to leave that comment over at espn.com. Honest mistake. Don’t feel bad about it.

  4. Gimpy McNolegs

    Dude, you’re being very un-dude. I’d like to see Brett Favre write snarky sports satire as well as DJ Gallo does. If we compare professions, DJ is the Montana / Brady of sports satire, Favre is the Curt Schilling of football (overrated jizzbucket fawned upon by media and homers), and you are the JJ Redick of pro basketball (pathetic and douchey).

  5. Brett,

    You can throw balls at my crotch all you want.

  6. Hey Gimpy, why don’t you go lick Pasta McRavioli’s sausage and shut up. Curt Schilling would be lucky to eat Favre’s poop. And not the nice, solid ones, but the soupy ones.

  7. garbonzo1977

    I met Brett one snowy night at a movie theater in Green Bay in 1995. Huge blizzard, only four people in the place. Thought I’d leave the guy in peace, but HE came up to ME to shoot the breeze. I just said ” Thank-you for all you’ve done for the Packers and us Packer fans.”, and shook his hand. Amazing athlete, class guy, ultimate competitor. I’m a huge life long Packer fan, but when are we all going to realize Brett did a million times more for the GBP than the GBP ever did for him. When are the GBP and all GBP fans going to realize how much of a privilege and blessing it was that Brett did what he did in Green Bay. He could just as well have done it elsewhere. I’ve spoken with guys who played for Lombardi and they all had the same self-assessment….average guys who were inspired to become extraordinary players and men. Brett, those of us who have really followed your career know that you became an extraordinary player and man mostly because of you, your Dad, and your family. You don’t owe anything to anybody but those you love and those who love you. Brett, I hope you and your family decide to put on the purple and gold and do what you do best. GO GIT ‘R DONE!

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